In this episode, Ari, a publicist at Atlantic Records, discusses her journey towards motherhood with Beth Gulotta, the host of the Quiet The Clock podcast.
Ari, a publicist at Atlantic Records, is on a journey to become a mother in the next one or two years. In her recent conversation with Beth Gulotta on the Quiet the Clock podcast, she shared her experience of navigating through dating, egg freezing, and motherhood. One of the highlights of the conversation was Ari’s decision to freeze her eggs as an insurance policy for motherhood.
Ari’s decision to freeze her eggs came after a mental breakdown caused by societal pressures to have children and settle down. Freezing her eggs provided a safety net and took the pressure off of strict timelines. Beth shared that only 15% of frozen eggs are actually used and that freezing them is like an insurance policy. Ari also discussed the benefits of therapy and how it provides an unbiased opinion and a safe, non-judgmental space.
The conversation emphasized the importance of finding joy in one’s own journey and not letting societal pressures dictate one’s decisions. Ari talked about the importance of educating oneself about fertility and taking meetings with fertility clinics to relay information to partners. She credited her coping skills, consistent therapy, and support from her family and friends for helping her get into a better headspace.
The lack of conversation and education around fertility and motherhood was also discussed. Beth and Ari encouraged women to listen to themselves and their desires, and to lean into their support systems. The conversation aimed to provide a space for women to feel heard, understood, and empowered in their own journeys.
In conclusion, Ari’s decision to freeze her eggs is an example of taking control of one’s own journey and finding joy in the process. Freezing eggs can provide an insurance policy for motherhood and take the pressure off of strict timelines. The conversation on the Quiet the Clock podcast emphasized the importance of education, therapy, and support systems in navigating through the uncertainty of dating, motherhood, and egg freezing.
Quotes:
- “don’t let anyone tell you different there is again no blueprint”
- “Your uterus doesn’t age so she said like your eggs age not your uterus your uterus is there if I’m not in menopause and you know there aren’t like any outstanding factors you can you can have a baby.”
- “i am on the right track and then i feel really good about it.”
- “the child has to fit into your life not the other way around.”
Key Points:
- Seeking Knowledge [00:00:00] Ari and Beth discuss the importance of seeking knowledge and information about motherhood, egg freezing, and career options.
- Two Different Friend Groups [00:04:04] Ari talks about navigating between two different friend groups, one settled with families and houses, and the other living life on edge, traveling, and bar hopping.
- Identity and Motherhood [00:06:26] Ari and Beth discuss the value of having time to build one’s identity, get clear on values and career, and not making one’s life the child’s life.
- Building the Foundation in Your Thirties [00:08:38] Ari talks about how her thirties allowed her to get her footing in her career and finances, and how she appreciates the freedom to travel and enjoy life before settling down.
- Freezing Eggs as a Safety Net [00:15:25] Ari shares her decision to freeze her eggs after a mental breakdown and societal pressures, and how it serves as a safety net for her future plans of having children.
- Taking the Pressure Off Timelines [00:16:57] Ari discusses how freezing her eggs takes the pressure off her and her boyfriend to have children on a strict timeline, allowing them to enjoy their time together without worrying about the future.
- Navigating Dating and Egg Freezing [00:17:38] Ari and Beth discuss the benefits of egg freezing and how it takes the pressure off dating. They also talk about the importance of being open and honest with potential partners about their decision to freeze their eggs.
- Educating Yourself on Fertility [00:20:03] Ari shares what she learned from her first consult at the fertility clinic, that your uterus doesn’t age, only your eggs do. She emphasizes the importance of educating yourself and taking meetings with fertility specialists to relay information to your partner.
- The Importance of Doing the Work [00:22:41] Ari and Beth discuss the importance of doing the work to get to a better headspace, and how it takes time and effort. Ari shares how her family and friends were a strong support system during her journey.
- The Cost of Egg Freezing [00:25:22] Ari discusses the cost of egg freezing and how she was able to afford it through her job benefits.
- Importance of Prioritizing Egg Freezing [00:26:22] Ari and Beth discuss the importance of prioritizing egg freezing and how it’s not something that is often talked about or thought about in one’s twenties or thirties.
- Normalizing Different Paths to Motherhood [00:32:37] Beth and Ari discuss the importance of normalizing different paths to motherhood and creating a supportive community for women who may feel isolated or alone in their journey.